Week 2.
..until monday. I had a meeting today (Wednesday 31st August) with Archant London and as from next week my X Factor blog will move to their LONDON24.COM website. It has nearly a million unique hits each month so I'm really looking forward to it. They asked me if I could be a bit less grumpy and I said, “Sure, but that would require the world to be a bit better than it is.” Let's see what happens.
Last Saturday night ITV excelled at making a TV show that combined a real life story, talent and both visual and musical entertainment for all the family. I’m talking about ‘An Audience With Will Young’. It was quality viewing even for someone who is not a huge fan. Sadly this is an X Factor blog so let the grumpiness begin.
In summary, the show had a handful of talent. The Keys were the best on the night closely followed by a Craig Colton in his X Factor jacket. Craig has a unique voice but not sure it will carry through the live shows. The Keys were polished and interesting and the best vocal group in years so I can 100% guarantee that they are in the live finals.
The show opened with Johnny Robertson, a skinny gay guy in his mid 40s wearing a baseball cap. I thought that he was either going to be rubbish or sound like a woman. It was the latter. I was going to tweet “Johnny would make a great drag queen” but feared the wrath of Twitter’s Thought Police telling me I was homophobic. It turns out that our Johnny is indeed a drag queen playing in London’s clubs under the name of Sara Lee!
We've just learned that Louis Walsh has been given the over 25s so there is a good chance that Johnny will make the finals... as long as he dresses as Sara Lee. Remember, Louis gave us Wagner and Jedward so he is game for a laugh and this year I expect nothing less. I would love to see Johnny turn up each week in bigger and better dresses. He would pull in huge TV numbers and imagine the fallout from a wardrobe malfunction! That reminds me, I must take the banana loaf out of the oven.
The big talking point this week has been Derry Mensah a Burger King worker who has done time for mugging. He had a good voice but The Sun are obsessed with his back story and how he saved a friend’s life after a gangland shooting. They have shown great interest in him that leads me to believe he will be hailed as the bad boy done good and a positive role model for the disenfranchised youth of today. The subject of bloomin' X Factor being an escape from flippin' burgers is worth a blog of it's own. I look forward to hearing more of Derry's voice and less of his past.
For the second series running the X Factor casting couch has involved a man being asked to show off his abs while the female judges swooned and Louis drooled. Are they trying to make up for years of boob jokes in Carry On movies or Benny Hill? It just felt a bit dated like watching Bruce Forsyth asking Anthea Redfern to "give us a twirl". Surely it's not becoming The X Factor - Next Generation Game? Equality is fine but let's not go back to the 1970s to achieve it.
The show closed with a young girl called Misha Bryan who sang ‘Respect’. She had a strong voice like Maria Lawson from Series Two but as I’ve worked with some fine singers I don’t think she was unique enough. She was, however raised by her aunt and doesn’t know who her dad is which is sad. Sad, in as much as, it was used to build up what was an already impressive performance. I could almost hear people in their homes shout at the TV " Please don’t cry, please don’t cry!!! Oh crap… tears already and it's only week two.
Hey, before you have a go at me, at least I waited until boot-camp and even then, my emotional turmoil was due to hunger pains. My old Jewish genes can only wait so long for cake. (By the way, I have a great recipe for Chocolate Babka)
So there you have it. Loads of boxes were ticked. We had a drag queen, a reformed mugger, a teenager with no parents, a chubby kid with his loving chubby parents, a guy with great abs but no voice and a boyband.
Lastly, I'm going to quote a couple of the funniest X Factor tweets I get as from this Saturday night so start following @stevebrookstein and sharing your gags. I can't always reply but I do read them.
...and remember. I don't check my blog for mistakes, the wife does. Blame her for my errors, I do.
See you next week on LONDON24.COM
2 comments:
I cant help but agree with everything you've said. Being a singer (and songwriter) myself I find it frustrating that people will use anything but talent to get 'famous.' I can understand sometimes its peoples last chance, but when some of the people are only 20 and younger, you have to question the reason theyre doing the show? Surely its much better to learn your craft first? Thats what im doing anyway and meeting so many people, having an amazing time playing acoustic venues round nottingham and derbyshire. I think people should try the 'hard' way first, because half of these people only go on the show for an instant fame boost...
I though Misha was great though the sob story was painful.
As for sob stories, Jade, last night, just went on and on and on about her nan. Her first single is going be: "Oh, Granny" sung to the tune of Mandy. So very annoying.
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